maybe it’s this place.
yesterday, i found myself flaring up over little things. someone was snapping at me. well, she always snaps at me. i think at me in particular, but maybe not. maybe i’m just paying her too much attention when i shouldn’t. her shoes are obviously too big for her. she can’t handle it and it’s showing because she’s overplaying the hitler bit. i’ve one word. pathetic. never mind her. never mind every one else. i’ve three months to bear here. maybe less if i play my cards right. i just don’t want to give certain people the feeling that they’ve managed to drive me out of this place. i’m moving out when my contract ends, and there’s no other way of going about it. right now, we’ll just have to learn to live with each other a tinee winee bit longer. god help me.
*
on my way home, after a pretty painful argument with someone, i found a black and white skinny kitten on the sidewalk gutter. it was crying for its mother. no one was looking, so i grapped my hanky and snatched the kitten by the neck. it stopped crying for a while, but i think it was in utter shock. its claws were out, and although i knew it couldn’t quite see yet, the kitten knew i wasn’t its mom. i was building grand plans of keeping it in a box, raising it on my own and hiding it from my mother, but when i saw how repulsive i must seem to the poor creature, i just let it lie on the grass patch where, well, i supposed it would be safe from the oncoming vehicles and what not. it cried again. let it cry. i hoped its mother would come get it soon.
i could still feel its warm skin against my fingertips when i got home. but hey, i’m pretty sick of forcing myself on people. on anything.
to hell with all kittens.
